Petra’s Trailer
Petra was trying to be quiet. She was up early, like she always was. She slipped out of the bed, trying to not wake Jonas. She wasn’t as worried about waking Jennifer. She could still hear her snoring in the upper bunk.
She ducked into the small bathroom for a quick wipe down. She was sweaty after sleeping in clothes under the covers. Jonas wouldn’t sleep under the covers with her. He insisted on sleeping on top of the covers under a separate blanket, ‘to keep things proper’ he said.
She wished he wouldn’t worry about ‘proper’. Hell, she sent him enough signals. What was wrong with him? Or, what was wrong with her? She thought he was interested in her, they hung out, enjoyed each other’s company. Where was the hang up? She knew what part of her feared it was; she was too young, or he saw her as too young.
There were times she caught him looking at her with a strange look in his eyes. As soon as he saw her looking, he would change his expression. She knew he had feelings for her. Hell. The way he shut down Nolan’s interest in her told her that much. He had a serious protective streak, that’s for sure! But what kind of protective? Was he seeing her like another daughter? That made some sense. Shit! She was the same size as Jennifer, why wouldn’t he?
But that’s not what she wanted! She already had Silas and Amber treating her like their own daughter, but not in a bad way. Hell! After meeting Violet…well, Amber and Silas might be treating her like one of their own, but there was no ‘babying’ in this family.
Her brain was bouncing topic to topic, angle to angle like it did all the time first thing in the morning before she had some coffee or tea to smooth out the brain. Her friends always thought it was weird how a jolt of caffeine calmed her down instead of spooled her up. Amber was the one who told her it was actually a medical thing with ADD people.
Well, if she was going to get her brain on track, she better get the water heating.
She stepped out of the bathroom and glanced over at the bed. Jonas was still asleep. She still didn’t know what she was going to do about him.
The hotpot was still out from last night, but she forgot to put water in it. Well, at least she filled the filter pitcher, so she had water ready to heat. She just had to load it and start it. She didn’t want to turn on the light over the stove and wake the others, so she was working from the tiny nightlight. She had issues with the pot when the lid wouldn’t open, and she almost dropped the water pitcher twice. She had to force herself to slow down. One of the things distracting her was her hair was falling in her eyes. She swipped a hand across and pushed it back.
“Petra…”
His voice startled her! She couldn’t help it! Her hands twitched and she splashed water all over the counter and, worse, all over her T-shirt! She almost dropped the pitcher on the floor before she got it to the counter. She stifled the scream at least. Instead she was talking in a frantic whisper.
“Dang it! Dang it! Dang it! Dang it!...Now I’m wet!” With her hands free, she was now holding the T-shirt away from her skin, trying to get away from the cold water.
Jonas’ whisper cut through her attention, bringing her complete focus over to him.
“Come over here. I can help.”
All of what she had been thinking earlier and more raced back through her head. The worry he thought she was too young, the possessiveness when he talked to Nolan about her, Amber’s comment about how he was probably worried about something she called rescuer syndrome or transference or maybe it was limerence? Whatever it was, she knew something was about to change.
Her heart felt like it was beating a thousand times a minute as she walked the few steps over to where Jonas was now sitting up in the bed. She wasn’t sure what the look in his eyes was now, but it was the same as those times she caught him before.
His hands slid under the hem of the shirt, but she didn’t feel them on her skin. He was pulling it away from her without lifting it off of her like he did last time. She blushed a little more at the memory of him whipping her top off out by the barn, not even the first time he made her half naked, either. He was talking again.
“I know I’ve been dodging the signs and signals you have been sending, and I’m sorry. I didn’t want your attraction to be a whim or some sort of result of the thing at the RV dealer. If there’s going to be more to ‘us’ I want it to be for the right reasons.”
“But you want there to be more, right?” Petra wasn’t sure how she even found her voice to ask him the question, but here it was, out in the open.
“Yes, I do, but I want to do it right, for the right reason. You are too important to me to screw it up with just some…fling? Some kinda sorta thing? I didn’t want to maybe take advantage of you and hurt you in any way if it wasn’t what you wanted.”
Petra could hear the emotion, the uncertainty in his voice. How could he think she didn’t want this! She had been trying to show him how much she wanted this for what seemed like forever! How could she prove it? She might know.
“It’s what I’ve wanted for a long time now.” She took another step forward and felt his warm hands on her cool skin. It felt both warm and electric. Part of her was in heaven now. She felt his hands moving, but not in the direction she expected. They slid around to the sides of her ribcage, away from her chest. She opened her eyes, eyes she wasn’t even aware she had closed, and looked at his face. There was a smile there.
“As much as I want to, and don’t get me wrong, I want to, this isn’t the right time and place for such things. I don’t want to rush something so important to me, important to us. I want to do this right and not screw it up getting in a rush.”
Petra wasn’t sure exactly what he was talking about, but she didn’t care! He wanted her! His hands moved again, pushing upwards and outward. In the blink of an eye, her shirt was off. Not the first time he has taken her shirt off, but she was facing him this time and wasn’t sure what to do next. He solved her dilemma.
“Better put a dry shirt on, otherwise Jennifer is going to ask questions I don’t have answers for yet. I’ll heat the water.”
“But we will continue this later?” Petra asked him. She had to get an affirmation of where they stood.
“Oh, I fully intend to do a lot more, but I want to go slow and do it right. You deserve nothing less.”
She wasn’t sure if it was being half naked in front of him again, or the new smile on his face with all it’s implications, or something new she couldn’t put a name to, but she wasn’t cold now. Her skin felt hot, flushed with …embarrassment? She didn’t know but for at least right now, this very moment, she felt happy.