Trekken Rednecks

Knoxville's Joker

Veteran Member
Redneck Trekkies

We have gone where no one has gone before. But that still does not mean there will not be the intuitive and inventive redneck that makes science twist its top and reinvents a whole new story. This is a collection of some of those antics.

Billy Joe Bob: Hey Jeb did that Riker guy tell you to soup up this here warp drive?

Jeb: No, but, I wanted to make the Kessel Run look like a slow motion Kentucky trot as we ran to the edge of the universe and put Wesley to shame. And BJ, you really need to calm down, if we can go so fast we will consume less antimatter so we can make more room for moonshine runs to the Romulans and Klingons.

BJ: But the last time we got found out running boot legs by riker, he made us clean the EVS conduits so much the place looked like it just came out of dry dock.

Jeb: but was he surprised when we figured out how to clear an area and modify reacter coolant as a super scrubber to remove sub molecular accumulations of organic materials.

BJ: And out of that we got the intergalactic Janitor of the year award.

::Later that night Riker goes to sleep and::

BJ: Jeb, did you soup up the shuttle like we talked about and over load it with hooch?

Jeb: Yep, and the Kingons and Romulans are ready to have a hoedown shindig to celebrate both getting more of their favorite brewskis.

BJ: Did you disable the security and system alerts so we won’t be missed for 4 hours.

Jeb: Yea, I turned the crew quarters all into holodecks and put the ship on auto pilot. No one will realize things are off for a long while

BJ: you isolated the crew and kept them occupied too?

::Shuttle arrives in neutral zone on a neutral planet::

BJ: We are coming in and we got hooch.

Translated from Klingon over comms relay: Hurry these romulans are getting a little tipsy on our blood wine and the Romulan ale is running low and things will get ugly if we start to run low and folks start to sober up.

:: Shuttle lands on pad and a collection of inebriated Romulans and Klingons stumble towards the landed craft with carts in tow to help unload::

Jeb: Who here wants some hooch? We got plenty for all of you and your empires. Long live the Romulan Star Empire and the Klingon empires!

:: Hooting and cheers are heard in the background::