Walrus Whisperer
Hope in chains...
"lonely vigil"
Got that right.
It makes me too sad anymore to talk about it so I won't.
Got that right.
It makes me too sad anymore to talk about it so I won't.
How To Deal With A DW Who Doesn't Get It?
- Thread starter Jmurman
- Start date
ARMY RANGER
Inactive
One of my six sister-in-laws believes in prepping so I can talk to her about it .When the others in my family mock me my wife does stand behind me,I have to give her credit for that.She tells my brothers and ther wives "he could be doing worse things than storing food and ammo". Which of course is true!
Some day they will learn,hopefully before its to late!
Fuzzychick
Membership Revoked
Unique said:Anyone here married to someone who "gets it" ?????
Nope, but I honestly believe there is a GI for a GI, JMHO..
Topusaret
Deceased
DW was a DGI until last year. Now, she's an AGI (almost gets it). She allows me my prepping, and joins in sometimes by suggesting that we get so and so...or wouldn't so and so be better.
The images of Katrina and Rita sealed the deal with her, but she needs reminders occasionally. And if I need one, this is the place to find the next expected disaster or conspiracy to get her attention with...muhhhahhhh Thanks!!!
The images of Katrina and Rita sealed the deal with her, but she needs reminders occasionally. And if I need one, this is the place to find the next expected disaster or conspiracy to get her attention with...muhhhahhhh Thanks!!!
Tundra Gypsy
Veteran Member
Perhaps we could send our spouses to Prep Camp and let them make do with eating very little and 'roughing' it without some normal meals. Sure wish there was such a camp; something to make believers out of them.....maybe send them to New Orleans for an eyeful and an empty belly.
My wife used to think I was completly nuts.
She started to come around after 911.
Round One
Things improved greatly when we had a power outage in Jan 2002. Our daughter was 4 months old. I started the gas heater (that she thought was silly to install) and moved her rocking chair close by. I got my battery and inverter out (than she had complained about taking up room in the house )and hooked up a lamp and the heater fan. I ask her "Would you like to bring the baby in hear where it is warm?" I held the sarcasim back with difficulty.
Round two
When a tornado/high wind knocked out power to my elderly inlaws. We took the generator to there house and kept things running for them for a couple of days.
Since then I haven't heard much negitive feedback about my prepping.
I make it a point not to rub it in about things. I believe she like knowing we are equipted to deal with problems but we seldom discuss such matters.
She started to come around after 911.
Round One
Things improved greatly when we had a power outage in Jan 2002. Our daughter was 4 months old. I started the gas heater (that she thought was silly to install) and moved her rocking chair close by. I got my battery and inverter out (than she had complained about taking up room in the house )and hooked up a lamp and the heater fan. I ask her "Would you like to bring the baby in hear where it is warm?" I held the sarcasim back with difficulty.
Round two
When a tornado/high wind knocked out power to my elderly inlaws. We took the generator to there house and kept things running for them for a couple of days.
Since then I haven't heard much negitive feedback about my prepping.
I make it a point not to rub it in about things. I believe she like knowing we are equipted to deal with problems but we seldom discuss such matters.
I'm married to a DGI. He comes up with the "figures" on why I shouldn't do this or that and I have no way to refute them. But the kids are in Scouts now so I may have a way to sneak some more stuff in.
I've learned the best thing to say with him is "prudent." Wouldn't it be prudent to have two sleeping bags in case we have another power outage to stay warm? Wouldn't it be prudent to restock those batteries? Make it look like you're just looking for comfort, not serious prepping.
The other thing I can get away with sometimes is shipping cost. "It doesn't cost any more shipping to add ___ on because I'm at free shipping."
A
I've learned the best thing to say with him is "prudent." Wouldn't it be prudent to have two sleeping bags in case we have another power outage to stay warm? Wouldn't it be prudent to restock those batteries? Make it look like you're just looking for comfort, not serious prepping.
The other thing I can get away with sometimes is shipping cost. "It doesn't cost any more shipping to add ___ on because I'm at free shipping."
A
My wife is a SGI. Sorta gets it and tolerates my prepping, but figures I get carried away with it.
The great ice storm and the Katrina - Rita debacles helped too. I send articles to her email once in a while and she reads about 1/2 of them. Hey, I figure, that's not too bad.
You can always pull the 51% / 49 % final say rule out. You get 51% say in some things and I get 51% say in others ... Somebody's got to make the decisions around here!
Sometimes, I just look at her when I've bought something and say "You don't want to know" and she says "You're right, I don't want to know".
Just carry on, carrying on.
John H
The great ice storm and the Katrina - Rita debacles helped too. I send articles to her email once in a while and she reads about 1/2 of them. Hey, I figure, that's not too bad.
You can always pull the 51% / 49 % final say rule out. You get 51% say in some things and I get 51% say in others ... Somebody's got to make the decisions around here!
Sometimes, I just look at her when I've bought something and say "You don't want to know" and she says "You're right, I don't want to know".
Just carry on, carrying on.
John H
My SO Gets It for sure. We have made household budgets that include prepping. In fact, we decided together not to buy a new stove when we realized even the burners won't light (gas) with a match when the electric is off. I fixed the old one...AGAIN. Even she understood how handy it was to have a stovetop that works when the electric is out.
We have been in a serious budget crunch and eaten out of the preps, which made it that much less stressful. And I am tight with cash, so we don't disagree about the $ being spent.
I know I am lucky, believe me!
We have been in a serious budget crunch and eaten out of the preps, which made it that much less stressful. And I am tight with cash, so we don't disagree about the $ being spent.
I know I am lucky, believe me!
Jurman:
1. You're doing the correct thing.
2. She'll come over to the 'doommer side' soon enough. If She's not blocking you from preping then let her enjoy the simple [innocence] life while she can.
==
My sweet DW is a SGI [Semi Gets It].
I got lots of razzing from OUR entire families, and still get it from my brother.
DW's epiffany came when I pulled out the sheet showing all our Insurance payments for the past 5 years. I asked how much did we get back? Forutantely, Zero! And we get to eat this insurance, and we do enjoy it often. The dates on the chilli was near the expiration, ... so she got to enjoy them at work when she works late.
It does help to pull stuff out of storage for use at the last minute.
The Major Epiffany came when she had to do the Nursing home huricane prep plan. They have enough food, water and supplies for 14 days. And they HAD to use them for Wilma! For 4 days they had genny electricity AND NO WATER comming out of the pipes! Thankfully it was cool that time. Not even 'dirty' water, NO water -- They had on hand sponge bath kits for everyone! Not pleasant but it sure could of been worse.
Although after we went on a vacation and stayed at visited friends, she got a tidy tear. We worked on the several rooms upon seeing all the stuff I had squrrelled away WHICH was impropperly stowed! I was banned from buy stuff for a month.
So by the end of the month she grew very tired of doing the main household shopping. And celebrated yesterday by giving me a long list.
1. You're doing the correct thing.
2. She'll come over to the 'doommer side' soon enough. If She's not blocking you from preping then let her enjoy the simple [innocence] life while she can.
==
My sweet DW is a SGI [Semi Gets It].
I got lots of razzing from OUR entire families, and still get it from my brother.
DW's epiffany came when I pulled out the sheet showing all our Insurance payments for the past 5 years. I asked how much did we get back? Forutantely, Zero! And we get to eat this insurance, and we do enjoy it often. The dates on the chilli was near the expiration, ... so she got to enjoy them at work when she works late.
It does help to pull stuff out of storage for use at the last minute.
The Major Epiffany came when she had to do the Nursing home huricane prep plan. They have enough food, water and supplies for 14 days. And they HAD to use them for Wilma! For 4 days they had genny electricity AND NO WATER comming out of the pipes! Thankfully it was cool that time. Not even 'dirty' water, NO water -- They had on hand sponge bath kits for everyone! Not pleasant but it sure could of been worse.
Although after we went on a vacation and stayed at visited friends, she got a tidy tear. We worked on the several rooms upon seeing all the stuff I had squrrelled away WHICH was impropperly stowed! I was banned from buy stuff for a month.
So by the end of the month she grew very tired of doing the main household shopping. And celebrated yesterday by giving me a long list.
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My DF is a GI. So much so, that when we went to Sam's one day, and I was looking at some earrings that, in another world, I would have loved to have-he came up to me and said, "See anything you like?"
I said, "yeah, and they are shaped just like another 100 rounds of ammo!"
Well, he laughed, but the next day the money I know he would have spent on jewelry for me, got spent on ammo for us.
I never have problems with buying prep items, and I am so thankful. He got an inverter from a friend for $50 bucks. I don't even have to remind him to watch for deals, he just does it himself now!
Pretty much I take care of storing domestic prepps, he takes care of tools and energy type stuff. I could never live with a DGI.
I said, "yeah, and they are shaped just like another 100 rounds of ammo!"
Well, he laughed, but the next day the money I know he would have spent on jewelry for me, got spent on ammo for us.
I never have problems with buying prep items, and I am so thankful. He got an inverter from a friend for $50 bucks. I don't even have to remind him to watch for deals, he just does it himself now!
Pretty much I take care of storing domestic prepps, he takes care of tools and energy type stuff. I could never live with a DGI.
Taz
Deceased
Chubby Hubby definitely gets it. Perhaps its because he lived high in the Cascade Mtns and one had to get supplies in before snow hit. Then in Alaska things had to be ordered for the year for when the barge came in from Seattle.
I too have always been a get it.
Yesterday we dropped $300 at Sam's Club, mostly on paper towels, TP,paper plates, coffee, laundry soap, etc. Only food we bought was 4 jars of Jif p-nut butter, a ham and a #10 can of cheese and two of sliced peaches. Oh yes, a large pancake mix and this morning I put it into half gal mason jars and vacum sealed it. I am fortunate and know it. We have the skills and the tools to survive. We both know how to garden, can, dehydrate, raise stock, butcher, etc.
Taz
I too have always been a get it.
Yesterday we dropped $300 at Sam's Club, mostly on paper towels, TP,paper plates, coffee, laundry soap, etc. Only food we bought was 4 jars of Jif p-nut butter, a ham and a #10 can of cheese and two of sliced peaches. Oh yes, a large pancake mix and this morning I put it into half gal mason jars and vacum sealed it. I am fortunate and know it. We have the skills and the tools to survive. We both know how to garden, can, dehydrate, raise stock, butcher, etc.
Taz
Scrapman
Veteran Member
For years my wife was the same way , I explained to her that society was one food delivery away from breaking down and she would shrug it off .
Then katrina took out NO and she realized I was right all along .
I never had a complaint out of her since ..
If anyone doesn't see things the way they really are after how quikly things deteariated in New Orleans they will never get it .
Scrapman...
Then katrina took out NO and she realized I was right all along .
I never had a complaint out of her since ..
If anyone doesn't see things the way they really are after how quikly things deteariated in New Orleans they will never get it .
Scrapman...
mistaken1
Has No Life - Lives on TB
Before 911 I had bought a surplus gas mask to the tune of "what do you need that for?"
After 911 with the anthrax scare I was asked "do you have a mask for all of the kids".
My answer was no, and her reply was "why not".
Since that time I have purchased whatever I feel is necessary. I try to balance having money to play with versus buying for the future. Now the biggest complaint I here is either "you should have bought more at that price" or "you should not have paid that much".
I have a good wife who works very hard to take care of our family. I am very thankful for her.
After 911 with the anthrax scare I was asked "do you have a mask for all of the kids".
My answer was no, and her reply was "why not".
Since that time I have purchased whatever I feel is necessary. I try to balance having money to play with versus buying for the future. Now the biggest complaint I here is either "you should have bought more at that price" or "you should not have paid that much".
I have a good wife who works very hard to take care of our family. I am very thankful for her.
Jmurman
Veteran Member
You know whats strange is that my DW is OK with the offbeat preps...like KI and N95 masks...and of course ammo and gun stuff.
It's just about food that she got goofy on me.
I do not like to take her shopping with me...grocery shopping that is. I like to by in bulk the items we use alot of. For example last week I bought an extra 12 pack of paper towels. We already had a 12 pack...she couldn't believe that we would actually have TWO large packs of paper towels. BTW we use paper towels like there's no tomorrow...same with TP.
Saturday evening we all went out to dinner at Outback. we haven't gone out to eat in a while and it was a very welcome break. While we were just chatting, I said that i wanted to re-do my workbench by laying down a layer of particle board...I then added "I can then bolt the 'reloading equiptment' on it..." (I don't have a reloader)
She got this really big smile "So you just 'threw that out there...like it would go right over my head..." We both laughed and then she continued "...How much is it?"
I told her the costs
"Well you work hard, so you should get it."
Women....go figure.
It's just about food that she got goofy on me.
I do not like to take her shopping with me...grocery shopping that is. I like to by in bulk the items we use alot of. For example last week I bought an extra 12 pack of paper towels. We already had a 12 pack...she couldn't believe that we would actually have TWO large packs of paper towels. BTW we use paper towels like there's no tomorrow...same with TP.
Saturday evening we all went out to dinner at Outback. we haven't gone out to eat in a while and it was a very welcome break. While we were just chatting, I said that i wanted to re-do my workbench by laying down a layer of particle board...I then added "I can then bolt the 'reloading equiptment' on it..." (I don't have a reloader)
She got this really big smile "So you just 'threw that out there...like it would go right over my head..." We both laughed and then she continued "...How much is it?"
I told her the costs
"Well you work hard, so you should get it."
Women....go figure.
almost ready
Inactive
wish you luck, try this:
Become a bargain hunter. We have kids who scorned the prepping thing, but they don't squeal when we save money by purchasing things on sale. Such as TP, canned goods, cleaning supplies, etc. These store easily and when you go shopping with the wife, you can say how glad you are you "stocked up" during that sale. Next sale, stock up more! Inflation is here, a penny saved is two pennies earned.
Join a warehouse and buy by the case to save pennies per unit. Buy the 20 pound bag of rice on the bottom shelf at the grocery store. Did you know that the bottom shelves of stores usually offer the best price per unit? Rice stores well. We buy coffee in 50 lb bags (mail order) and roast our own. It tastes much better than store, and even after pricing in the roaster and grinder (small ones) we are saving about 30% on the coffee. It will store for years if it's not roasted.
Best of luck to you. Emphasize the extra pennies (positive) instead of fear. We've been prepping for several years this way, and it has paid off tremendously!
Become a bargain hunter. We have kids who scorned the prepping thing, but they don't squeal when we save money by purchasing things on sale. Such as TP, canned goods, cleaning supplies, etc. These store easily and when you go shopping with the wife, you can say how glad you are you "stocked up" during that sale. Next sale, stock up more! Inflation is here, a penny saved is two pennies earned.
Join a warehouse and buy by the case to save pennies per unit. Buy the 20 pound bag of rice on the bottom shelf at the grocery store. Did you know that the bottom shelves of stores usually offer the best price per unit? Rice stores well. We buy coffee in 50 lb bags (mail order) and roast our own. It tastes much better than store, and even after pricing in the roaster and grinder (small ones) we are saving about 30% on the coffee. It will store for years if it's not roasted.
Best of luck to you. Emphasize the extra pennies (positive) instead of fear. We've been prepping for several years this way, and it has paid off tremendously!
Surprise
Inactive
My DH is coming around a bit at a time.
When I found vienna sausage for 33 cents each the other day, he asked why I didnt buy all of them...
And he has stocked up on some gasoline and paper products.
I think his extra gas purchase though was really because of all the talk about hurricane season being upon us.
Oh and he found an antique gas heater that only requires you turn on the gas line connected to it and then and hold a match to it-,no electricity required.He did that after the neighbor told us of ice storms really doing a number on the power lines in this area due to all the trees a few years back.
What bugs me alot is our cats and not having enough food around for them if TSHTF-----one of our cats has to have the urinary tract special dry good----he has almost died before, so he has to have the special food. None of the stores nearby carry it, so we HAVE to go to one particular store--and it is a few miles away.
But Dh says if we go buy a whole bunch of it,It will cause me to feed them more.
He says when He "sees" that something is about to go down, he will take action...
But then hordes of others are going to "see" it too.....
We only have one car so I cant go out and sneak and do this stuff that I would really like to.
His family was really into Y2K prep----and DH was somewhat--from that prep, we still have Coleman stove and fuel and battery operated radios and tv's.
But now his family are not any help with him. They are all of the ""God will provide, but better yet, we are about to be raptured away" mind set, so no help there.
My 71 year old Mother used to scoff at me, but as she watches the news,she at least TALKS about possiblities of TSHTF. She still procrastinates though in really getting supplies.
When I found vienna sausage for 33 cents each the other day, he asked why I didnt buy all of them...
And he has stocked up on some gasoline and paper products.
I think his extra gas purchase though was really because of all the talk about hurricane season being upon us.
Oh and he found an antique gas heater that only requires you turn on the gas line connected to it and then and hold a match to it-,no electricity required.He did that after the neighbor told us of ice storms really doing a number on the power lines in this area due to all the trees a few years back.
What bugs me alot is our cats and not having enough food around for them if TSHTF-----one of our cats has to have the urinary tract special dry good----he has almost died before, so he has to have the special food. None of the stores nearby carry it, so we HAVE to go to one particular store--and it is a few miles away.
But Dh says if we go buy a whole bunch of it,It will cause me to feed them more.
He says when He "sees" that something is about to go down, he will take action...
But then hordes of others are going to "see" it too.....
We only have one car so I cant go out and sneak and do this stuff that I would really like to.
His family was really into Y2K prep----and DH was somewhat--from that prep, we still have Coleman stove and fuel and battery operated radios and tv's.
But now his family are not any help with him. They are all of the ""God will provide, but better yet, we are about to be raptured away" mind set, so no help there.
My 71 year old Mother used to scoff at me, but as she watches the news,she at least TALKS about possiblities of TSHTF. She still procrastinates though in really getting supplies.
'They are all of the ""God will provide, but better yet, we are about to be raptured away" mind set...'
Many, MANY years ago I heard a sermon on Acts, where the angel is springing Peter from the pokey, and the angel pokes Peter to wake him up. The angel causes the chains to fall off Peter, then says, "Put on your sandals and come along."
The point is that the angel did what Peter could not do for himself, but it was up to Pete to put on his own sandals! And wouldn't it be nice if God had provided a Mecedes-Benz-style ark for Noah, complete with animals and food! Nope! Noah had to do the grunt work. God sent the animals, but Noah had to get 'em packed in!
(And how many people were raptured out of NOLA?)
--Rich
Many, MANY years ago I heard a sermon on Acts, where the angel is springing Peter from the pokey, and the angel pokes Peter to wake him up. The angel causes the chains to fall off Peter, then says, "Put on your sandals and come along."
The point is that the angel did what Peter could not do for himself, but it was up to Pete to put on his own sandals! And wouldn't it be nice if God had provided a Mecedes-Benz-style ark for Noah, complete with animals and food! Nope! Noah had to do the grunt work. God sent the animals, but Noah had to get 'em packed in!
(And how many people were raptured out of NOLA?)
--Rich
annieosage
Inactive
This is a great thread. DH is not really a DGI but he does not really GI either. The other night we were watching 10.5 and I brought up the thread here- what if you had 20 minutes to get out? What would you bring? So we have this long conversation about it and I told him I already have it planned out and some day we need to have a drill. Well he says, "Why don't you have a bag packed so you can just grab it and run?" 
I looked at him and said, "What do you think those 3 bags in the hall closet are for silly?"
He never says anything to me about the preps I buy but I still am not sure he really gets it. We have been having more and more talks about IT though so I think he is starting to finally listen! The more movies we watch about natural disasters he understands why I do it. Little does he know that is just one scenario I am planning for....
I looked at him and said, "What do you think those 3 bags in the hall closet are for silly?"He never says anything to me about the preps I buy but I still am not sure he really gets it. We have been having more and more talks about IT though so I think he is starting to finally listen! The more movies we watch about natural disasters he understands why I do it. Little does he know that is just one scenario I am planning for....
6ftofun
Inactive
What's the saying? A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still.....
You will not likely change her mind until the SHTF and she is sitting pretty unlike most of the neighbors.
If she's open to it, though, I like the idea mentioned above- a bit of "anti- prep therapy"
Trip the breakers, unplug the phones, park the cars and turn off the water. I give her a couple of hours before she has broken into the prep stash
You will not likely change her mind until the SHTF and she is sitting pretty unlike most of the neighbors.
If she's open to it, though, I like the idea mentioned above- a bit of "anti- prep therapy"
Trip the breakers, unplug the phones, park the cars and turn off the water. I give her a couple of hours before she has broken into the prep stash
WildDaisy
God has a plan, Trust it!
VesperSparrow said:Wait till you have to break into your preps for supper like some of us have and NO money to replace them.
She'll see then.
Its just going to have to take a real experience maybe for her to get it.
Just MO said in love and concern. I think ALOT of people are in for a MAJOR shock real soon. Sadly.
Just pray.
I'm in the same situation. After 15 years with the same company and and super review record, and perfect attendance for 4 years running, I was laid off. Preps have paid off and the family now understands why I did it.
With the hurricane season predictions for my area, and the coverage of Katrina, they now see the light.
To have and not need = good
To need and not have = not good
There are WAY too many situations looming on the horizon that are very very possible by way of disaster. Natural, economic, war...they are all likelyhoods. How can one be so oblivious as not to see it. By turning your back or closing your eyes, it wont make it go away.
Tell your wife...which would she rather in a time of strife? A man who thought enough of his family to have prepared for their safety and their needs, or a man who is running around in a town of gun toting gangsters looking to raid the nearest market for food to feed their starving family?
Sure, you may never need it. But what if you do and you didnt prep? Thats a scarier thought than the few bucks each week you spend on stocking up. How much does she spend on makeup or clothes? How about the kids on pizza, movies and popcorn? That stuff isnt needed either, and yet we all are willing to spend on frivilious things without so much as an after thought. But when we spend on something that brings to mind that there are real disaster possibilities out there, suddenly money is an issue.
Its not in our house anymore. We paid for some incidentals the other day on change we scrounged from the piggy bank because we had no cash. But we have lots of food for dinners and baking. I told them imagine what we would be doing if we needed to scrounge for money for a weeks worth of groceries? We'd be hungry by now. Now, they get it.
WildDaisy
God has a plan, Trust it!
RiJoRi said:
In fact, when someone challanges me with the God will provide thing, I go one further. I ask them to show me one person in the bible who was saved from disaster by divine act who did not do something to help themselves as instructed by God. The exception being Jesus. Noah, built, Joseph stored.
No manna fell from heaven in NOLA. No ravens came to deliver morsels of bread during the Northridge quake.
fruit loop
Inactive
She'll see the light
Tell her you are "one of those survivalist fruit loops" and keep at it.
Tell her you are "one of those survivalist fruit loops" and keep at it.