Wrath of the Midnight Cat
Through bedroom dark the feline slithered,
And glared at mouse, whose courage withered.
The pounce then came, from savage beast,
As mouse was added to the feast.
The cat then jumps on bed of Human.
Drops mouse on man, and starts a-groomin'.
The gift he leaves on blankets white
Will stink and fester through the night.
When man awakes to find dead mouse,
An outraged roar will fill the house.
He'll seek said kitty, and for said stunt,
Clear out fornt door the cat he'll punt.
Dear cat does not yet know his fate,
The hours still are dark and late.
Kitty cleans his feet and chest,
And parts by now you ought've guessed.
Post-cleansing, cat runs off to find,
A loose sock man hath left behind.
There! Odd left sock lies on the floor
Chance for fun and play galore.
The feline crouches, slinks and stalks,
The Wolen Grey, the king of socks!
The tail goes flat, the claws extend,
And like lightning kitty starts to rend!
The rapid motion, felinic blur,
A teeming mass of lard and fur.
The sock is toast, its fibers shredded,
Another piece of clothing deaded.
Yet satisfied our cat is not,
His small mind filled with evil thought
His brain works hard to fill his yearning,
Synapses firing, neurons churning
Triumphantly, an idea flares-
He'll go nudge something down the stairs!
He trots on up, to find a vase,
That's light enough to move with paws.
His new toys rolls along the hall,
Approaching its terminal fall,
Cat nudges vase up to the brink,
The coming crash should raise a stink.
Just one more push and off it goes,
It tumbles twice, its final throes,
Crash! as it hits the second stair,
It's getting weak, it's almost there.
It bounces off the fourth and shatters,
All o'er steps the dead vase spatters.
The humans wake up with a start,
as final pieces break apart.
With shouts of "What just happened, mom?"
And "I don't know what's going on."
To "Honey, what ht hell was that!?"
"I think it was that G--D----ed cat!"
The feline starts, he heard his name,
He tries to run and hide in shame,
He seeks dark corners in the house...
And then the humans find the mouse.
"That bloody cat is friggin’ nuts!"
"The bed is full of rodent guts!"
"I'll KILL the little SOB!"
And at that cat decides to flee.
With panicked eyes he looks around,
And seeks a place to go to ground.
He skitters 'neath a child's bed,
Swats at intruding human head.
"I've found him, mom!" young human cries
Thinks kitty, 'Next one looking dies.'
Then father shouts "I've got the gun!"
And feline sets off at a run.
He barrels straight on down the hall,
While praying that he doesn't fall,
The shotgun roars, a load of lead
Goes whizzing over kitty's head.
Poor feline, taken in by fright,
He searches left, he searches right,
Thinking that his doom is certain,
goes and hides behind a curtain.
Heavy footsteps fall, then cease.
Cat is still, a total freeze.
The gun is lowered, aimed at heart...
Kitty wakes up with a start.
Mid afternoon, the cat awakes,
forgets the dream, as conscience takes.
The cat is bored; he licks his paws.
Then ambles off to find a vase...
Brihard