Livestock Lambing


Veteran Member
I wrote this for my Facebook page. Lambing is a trying time. Rewards, frustrations, sadness--all in the same day sometimes.
I had a neighbor in the mountain community I once lived in who would say if she ever lost her mind, she was going to get a gun and pick off the RVs driving oh so slowly up the pass highway. I have recently thought about this, but I would choose different targets should I go postal: ewes.
This time of year, my good-tempered, intelligent sheep lose their minds. An excess of hormones drives them to personality changes that I find difficult to deal with in an exhausted state.
...The Lamb Stealer: “My baby.” “That’s not your baby, sweetie, that’s another ewe’s lamb.” “My baby!”” Not yours, honey, you’ve just barely gone into labor and your hormones are telling you that you already have one.” “MY baby.” “Look dear, just leave the lamb alone and have yours! You don’t get to just skip the hard work and pain and go straight to the cuddling phase!” “MY BABY!” “Look, you idiot, go lie down and PUSH!”
The Self-Interested Mother: Me: “Your lamb is bleating. Go feed it.” “I’m eating here. I don’t care if he’s hungry right now.” “He’s blatting loud enough to wake the dead. Go feed him.” “The little brat will get dinner after I get mine.” “I can’t hear myself think! The neighbors will think I’m torturing animals!” “Munch. Chew. Swallow.”
The Ovine Terrorist: “I keel you!” “I’m not hurting your lamb, just dipping its navel.” “I keel you!” “Not hurting it, all done, go away!” “I keel you!” “Beat it, you woolly moron, quit following me! I don’t eat raw lamb and I wouldn’t eat yours anyway!” “I keel you!”


Contributing Member
The Ovine Terrorist sounds just like Jeff Dunham's terrorist puppet. Have met the bovine version a time or two. :)


LOL! We're heading into what will likely be our last calving season (planning on selling all but maybe 3 or 4 cows and a bull... sick of working this hard for nothing). It's very bittersweet... I'm definitely getting to the point where the endless midnight (and 2 am, 3 am and 4 am) checks are getting to be more than I can handle. And mostly, cow's don't get quite as nuts as sheep (a bit higher brainpower to start with)

But that doesn't mean you can ever forget about the potential Bovine Terrorist... we did butcher a nice 7 year old cow last year because she'd gone from being dangerously aggressive for 24 hours or so after calving to needing to be securely tied for 3 WEEKS, to trying to kill us in the pasture all summer. Plus, she was horned. The hamburger is delicious!

But there is nothing cuter than a pasture full of calves or lambs, once we catch up on our sleep!

Good luck this year...