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CHAT Seriously, I'm struggling to understand why this bothers me so much...
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  1. #1
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    Seriously, I'm struggling to understand why this bothers me so much...

    Yesterday, on my way home, I stopped at the local Dollar Store here in Southwestern Illinois for eggs, bread and some peanuts (for snacking).

    I love the Dollar Store because it has the basics at a good price and there's usually no long lines.

    Yesterday, at 2:30 pm, there was a woman in front of me who purchased - literally - a cart filled with sugary junk food. This woman appeared to be in her 30s, and she was about 5'2" and weighed at least 400 pounds. She could barely walk due to the profound obesity.

    She had no "real food" in her cart. It was Little Debbie Snack Cakes, powdered donuts, several cartons of specialty flavored ice cream (which were on sale for $2 each), chips, sugary drinks, and candy bars.

    We're talking about $125 spent at the Dollar Store, which takes some serious effort.

    Next, she paid for this with an EBT card.

    Lastly, she pulled out $50 cash to pay for several packs of cigarettes.

    I suspect that taxpayers are also paying for her healthcare.

    Somehow, this just really rubs me the wrong way that I'm paying plenty of taxes, and eating my leafy greens and lean meat, and exercising every day and striving to stay healthy and yet, I'm paying for someone else's really poor choices?

    And honestly, I'm not even sure what it is about this scene that unnerved me. Is it just a sign of America's unraveling? Or does it just look like a waste of God's gift of life? Or is it just wasteful, PERIOD?

    I am not even sure. It just unnerved me.

  2. #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by Betty_Rose View Post
    Yesterday, on my way home, I stopped at the local Dollar Store here in Southwestern Illinois for eggs, bread and some peanuts (for snacking).

    I love the Dollar Store because it has the basics at a good price and there's usually no long lines.

    Yesterday, at 2:30 pm, there was a woman in front of me who purchased - literally - a cart filled with sugary junk food. This woman appeared to be in her 30s, and she was about 5'2" and weighed at least 400 pounds. She could barely walk due to the profound obesity.

    She had no "real food" in her cart. It was Little Debbie Snack Cakes, powdered donuts, several cartons of specialty flavored ice cream (which were on sale for $2 each), chips, sugary drinks, and candy bars.

    We're talking about $125 spent at the Dollar Store, which takes some serious effort.

    Next, she paid for this with an EBT card.

    Lastly, she pulled out $50 cash to pay for several packs of cigarettes.

    I suspect that taxpayers are also paying for her healthcare.

    Somehow, this just really rubs me the wrong way that I'm paying plenty of taxes, and eating my leafy greens and lean meat, and exercising every day and striving to stay healthy and yet, I'm paying for someone else's really poor choices?

    And honestly, I'm not even sure what it is about this scene that unnerved me. Is it just a sign of America's unraveling? Or does it just look like a waste of God's gift of life? Or is it just wasteful, PERIOD?

    I am not even sure. It just unnerved me.
    Shouldn't be much longer now
    Tax the rich, feed the poor, til there are, rich no more - Ten Years After
    Surely you're not saying we have the resources to save the poor from their lot. -JCSS
    Friend, you cannot legislate the poor into freedom by legislating the wealthy out of freedom. And what one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving. The government can't give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody.

  3. #3
    It sounds like she has a food addiction which I’m not endorsing but it’s like any other addiction and she needs to get serious help.

  4. #4
    End Welfare.

    If someone has a say in what comes out of YOUR wallet, you should have a say in what goes into THEIR mouth.

  5. #5
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    Sadly you will probably be paying for her funeral expenses soon too. The cost is small compared to the cost of her choices in life. Its sad when food and cigarettes provide more enjoyment than the outdoors that God has to offer. I try to eat healthy myself and enjoy so many things in life. I guess some of us see life through rose colored glasses.
    Alabama - Independent Now and Forever - Noli Me Tangere

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  6. #6
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    Though I do enjoy our golden age of prosperity, it does have a few side effects that we can do without. What the op cites is an example. If we all were more worried about just feeding our families, the example described by the op would be rare.

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by rhughe13 View Post
    Sadly you will probably be paying for her funeral expenses soon too. The cost is small compared to the cost of her choices in life. Its sad when food and cigarettes provide more enjoyment than the outdoors that God has to offer. I try to eat healthy myself and enjoy so many things in life. I guess some of us see life through rose colored glasses.
    This is going to sound harsh, but it doesn't strike me as sad at all. She is a parasite. I have compassion for obese people who are suffering due to having accepted the wrong dietary information, nevertheless, better information is out there, for free. People have to go find it, and apply it.

    This woman is living off the labor of others, and not even trying (smoking as well). The sooner people like her are in their graves, the better. You always get more of what you subsidize.
    Our society needs a big re-set.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Craftypatches View Post
    It sounds like she has a food addiction which I’m not endorsing but it’s like any other addiction and she needs to get serious help.
    Yeah right. Everything is an addiction. No disrespect to you or your opinion but this kind of attitude has been CULTIVATED by powers that hate us.

    Where's my help and support group for working 12 hours then working at home 6 or 8 more hours? The welfare dregs are asleep when I go to work and drinking beer when I drive by in the evening. At least they wave and nod a "thanks" when I drive by. /sarc

    Betty-Rose, free-will to make bad choices is nothing new. Caring about that person or CARING about how the system isn't doing them or you any favors is a sign of wisdom. Don't dwell too much on it. Jesus said we'd always have the poor.

    FTR, I'm thankful I've been given the ability to work and been blessed with all I could stand. Truly blessed. I do NOT look down on "poor" people. By some standards in the US, I'm poor too.
    "You are allowed to be disappointed but not surprised"

  9. #9
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    Sadly, many 30 something year olds never had a parent at home to teach them to cook or how to run a house. They had no chores either. They sat and did basically nothing till someone came home with dinner. Parents meaning to give their children an easy life, actually crippled them. Sadly many do not know what real food taste like, or how to cook it. I once had a kid start gagging at her first bite of chicken that was not a glued together nugget. That was all she had ever had and couldn't handle the different texture. Her brother would tell you, he only ate sweet stuff. This was 20 years ago, and they had a stay at home mother. Just a very lazy one. My kids had chores and learned to run a house. They get very frustrated with their peers over lack of work ethic and immaturity.

  10. #10
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    www.peopleofwalmart.com


    I understand your anger, as I’d feel the same.

  11. #11
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    Betty Rose, your anger is centered at the wrong person, it should be centered at government and allowing her to purchase junk. It never use to be that way, but like knee-grows they wanna have what the rest of us people have at the taxpayer expense. It never use to be that way, but now it's over the top! Enjoy looking at this receipt - it is REAL!



    And as for the fat lady, shame on you for body shaming! Don't you know that that's politically incorrect? She only has fork and hand-to-mouth disease. /snark

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Faroe View Post
    This is going to sound harsh, but it doesn't strike me as sad at all. She is a parasite. I have compassion for obese people who are suffering due to having accepted the wrong dietary information, nevertheless, better information is out there, for free. People have to go find it, and apply it.

    This woman is living off the labor of others, and not even trying (smoking as well). The sooner people like her are in their graves, the better. You always get more of what you subsidize.
    Our society needs a big re-set.
    There have always been people who have done that very thing. Living off the labor of others. We had very few at the start of this nation as most of those who came to America and were born here, had to work hard in order to survive. After a bit of time and as prosperity came forth, we began to have more of those who yearned to live off the labor of others and were actually able to do so.

    Yes, I realize we have always have had bums since the first people of our great nation came here. It's just that there weren't many of them.

  13. #13
    Just wait till you get to watch them sell their fs in front of you .
    an easygoing has bred govenrment dependency into people. We need to go back to commodities. Hard to get morbidly obese on brand and rice.

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by Digger View Post
    Sadly, many 30 something year olds never had a parent at home to teach them to cook or how to run a house. They had no chores either. They sat and did basically nothing till someone came home with dinner. Parents meaning to give their children an easy life, actually crippled them. Sadly many do not know what real food taste like, or how to cook it. I once had a kid start gagging at her first bite of chicken that was not a glued together nugget. That was all she had ever had and couldn't handle the different texture. Her brother would tell you, he only ate sweet stuff. This was 20 years ago, and they had a stay at home mother. Just a very lazy one. My kids had chores and learned to run a house. They get very frustrated with their peers over lack of work ethic and immaturity.
    I'd say that many of us here do not fall into that category. Probably because we learned how to cook, sew, and raise a family in school. It was called Home Economics. My son (he's in his 40's), took similar classes, but the school system saw fit to get rid of those type of classes. TPTB decided that woodworking, metal shop, home economics weren't useful skills for living life. So, we now have 2 generations of stupid, and those of us see the stupidity and are reaping the rewards of that stupidity. Fat people riding around in motorized shopping carts, oxygen in their nose, and a cart full of crap. My sympathy meter is at zero.

  15. #15
    When I was on food stamps myself this sort of thing bothered me (the 1980s) and I would have happily given up any "right" to buy junk food and fizzy drinks for "coupons" (now EBT whatever)that let me buy personal supplies, deodorant, toilet paper and soap/laundry liquid.

    It is rather hard to look nice for job interviews in 100-degree heat (no AC)washing clothing by hand and very limited access to various "personal care" products - not impossible (baking soda is your friend) but it doesn't work all that well under your arms in that kind of heat.

    These days, modern technology should make it even easier than it would have been back then to have "permitted" and "non-permitted" products, but then the big food lobbies would scream because most of what would be tossed out the door would be their industrialized processed garbage.

    You can see that reflected in States that "tried" to limit "food stamp" purchases, I remember one proposed State law that "banned" bags of raw potatoes (on the idea that poor people eat too many of them) and large bags of dried beans (the traditional cheap poor food and unprocessed as you can get).

    Instead (of course) of going after frozen french fries and super-processed canned beans with lots of junk in them.

    On the other hand, my heart used to go out to the overweight Moms with six kids at the "used bread store" (our joke it was the day-old shop) buying bulk packages of dried pasta, donuts, white bread, crisps, etc to fill up the tummies of their little ones.

    You could tell by some of the other things they bought (like beans and potatoes) that they knew how to eat (this was in the late 1970s/early 1980s) but didn't have the money to stretch out and buy enough of it to feed that many kids

    This poor women you saw at the Dollar Store, probably does have a food addiction (like my Dad) but if her EBT didn't allow the purchase of that kind of junk she would at least have to buy flour, sugar, salt, flavoring, etc and make this stuff herself and probably eat a lot less of it.
    expatriate Californian living in rural Ireland with husband, dogs, horses. garden and many, many cats

  16. #16
    It can be a hard road to navigate. On one hand, as luddite points out, one gets tired of being the sap who follows the rules pulls the weight, does the work and pays the bills, without so much as thank you.

    Lord knows there are days when it's very hard not to do some plain speaking to folk who are in this that or the other situation because they don't have options or whatever. Of course they have options, they simply choose different ones.

    Bottom line, for me, though, is i choose not to harbor the bitterneß and resentment over other people's choices.
    Not because of my position as " soul authority", but because it's not good for my health. Makes my shoulders clench up, and acid flood my stomach, and people my age get the faces they deserve, and I m too vain to walk around looking bitter.

    Usually requires a few talks with the man upstairs, asking for his interventions.

    I also try to turn things ar to something that I can impact. For instance, I f low allows junk food purchases and smokes is coming out of my ears over it, then I try to figure out how that law can be altered.
    Thoughts are things. Thus I'm careful of the thoughts I think, & the company I keep.
    She couldn't keep her colors inside the lines, so she drew new lines.

  17. #17
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    Two issues. Life is full of choices, she has made hers and she has to live or die with those choices and in this case probably die soon. The bigger issue is the programs and enablers behind those programs that engender these lifestyles. I’d do away with those SNAP cards and restrict those programs to basic foodstuffs only. If your on the public dole you shouldn’t be able to eat like a king and neither should you be able to buy junk food. Just the basics and if they don’t have the skills to learn how to cook with the basics give them books or DVD’s along with them to learn. I don’t know about you but hunger would be a great motivator to learn.
    What is the lake of fire? What is it's purpose? Is the lake of fire eternal hell? Is there any hope of escape for those cast into this lake?
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  18. #18
    just one more thin mint mam, just a little one....

  19. #19
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    It’s “waffer thin”...

  20. #20
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    Betty,
    It is careless living. She just doesn't care about herself; she doesn't care about you. It is the life of an addict: self destructing, not caring.
    Not surprised that it bothers you, because that is still a minority that lives like that.

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bardou View Post
    I'd say that many of us here do not fall into that category. Probably because we learned how to cook, sew, and raise a family in school. It was called Home Economics. My son (he's in his 40's), took similar classes, but the school system saw fit to get rid of those type of classes. TPTB decided that woodworking, metal shop, home economics weren't useful skills for living life. So, we now have 2 generations of stupid, and those of us see the stupidity and are reaping the rewards of that stupidity. Fat people riding around in motorized shopping carts, oxygen in their nose, and a cart full of crap. My sympathy meter is at zero.
    Yep, we also had sewing class and an actual cooking class with stove and all. It was strange, but very helpful!

  22. #22
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    Look at it as an alcoholic leaving the liquor store. An addiction. a "weakness", whatever...it's powerful.

    One of those situations where you have to figure "there but for the grace of God go I" .

  23. #23
    SNAP actually IS a limited program and works very well to help prevent actual complications during pregnancy and for young children/nursing mothers.

    In my opinion, it is the program that EBT cards should copy (and something similar put into place in Ireland which saw actual complications from lack of food during the 2008 recession in both children and adults).

    Otherwise, I agree with you and I know it is complicated with so many programs out there but SNAP proves that it is possible to limit what a program can provide to certain healthy food items, modern technology should make it even easier to say modify an EBT card for someone on a special diet or in a homeless hotel with no kitchen (who should be among the only people allowed to eat take-out food using one) etc.

    But my hunch again is reality the Big Agra/Big Food companies make billions off of the current system and will continue to try to put roadblocks up to any sort of real change that involves trying to wean people off their sugar/salt/fat/starch junk and relearning skills like cooking greens or roasting a Sunday chicken and eating off of it for three days (chicken a la King, soup etc).
    expatriate Californian living in rural Ireland with husband, dogs, horses. garden and many, many cats

  24. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Melodi View Post

    This poor women you saw at the Dollar Store, probably does have a food addiction (like my Dad) but if her EBT didn't allow the purchase of that kind of junk she would at least have to buy flour, sugar, salt, flavoring, etc and make this stuff herself and probably eat a lot less of it
    .
    I about choked on my coffee reading that statement. First of all, she wouldn't know what to do with flour, sugar, flavoring because it's called WORK! Power to cook it, then the cleanup. I'm pretty sure even her kitchen sink has never seen a good scrubbing. These people cried and whined that they should be able to purchase what the general public purchases. A guy who just got out of jail approached me in the store and asked if he could buy the stuff in his cart (ALL CRAP), with his EBT card. He even said "I got the munchies." The kid looked to be about 20. I asked him where he was from, he said Arkansas. As it turned out he didn't want to live at home so he took off for California. He told me his father was a Sheriff. I advised him to go back to Arkansas and become a productive person. I told him there was a reason why he was in put in jail, and the next time it will be prison, where you will become Bubba's girlfriend. He shined me on, I didn't care, I got my Ann Landers moment in.

  25. #25
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    Way way way way waaaaaayyyyyyy back in the olden day’s, if you used food stamps, you had to shop in UDSA stores. Those stores only sold staples. No junk, no sweets, just basic, wholesome food items.

  26. #26
    People forget that in the late 19th and early 20th centuries charities, churches and settlement houses helped both new arrivals and less-educated Americans (especially in urban areas) to learn to how to sew, cook and survive on very limited incomes.

    That is part of led to classes like Home Economics in the first place, I can still remember taking classes at the local rural college with my Mom who knew how to cook but it was fun to learn new ways of doing it or how to use then new-fangled kitchen equipment to make things we hadn't thought about.

    That was in the 1960s when such "education extensions" were already starting to go out of fashion, it is probably time to bring them back.
    expatriate Californian living in rural Ireland with husband, dogs, horses. garden and many, many cats

  27. #27
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    Hi, Betty. Glad you got moved and are settling in!

    Here's how I handle it: when I shop at Aldi, the Dollar Store, or Walmart, I remind myself that I'm going to run into people who annoy me for various reasons. I have a choice -- I can either save some cash -OR- I can shop where there are fewer people who bother me -- and pay a lot more money.

    I will be in the store ten minutes or less and will save $XX (amount varies).

    I focus on that, and when I leave the store, I forget about what I have seen and heard. I turn on some nice music or go for a relaxing walk.

    Hope that helps a little!

  28. #28
    Quote Originally Posted by Dennis Olson View Post
    Way way way way waaaaaayyyyyyy back in the olden day’s, if you used food stamps, you had to shop in UDSA stores. Those stores only sold staples. No junk, no sweets, just basic, wholesome food items.
    When Dennis? My Mom was a church volunteer when they moved from commodities to food stamps in our local area and I was with her when she took the elderly women she was volunteering with to the supermarket for the first time with food stamps.

    It was the local market and she cried because she had a choice of hamburger or chicken instead of whatever was in the can.

    When the family was getting commodities my Mom used to "trade" her for them buying things like milk, juice, oatmeal etc for their 2-year-old grandchild (that lived with them) and taking the commodities home to our house (cornmeal, very fatty and horrible canned pork, dried milk etc) where my Mom taught me to cook with some of it (she grew up dirt poor) but a lot went to our chickens to make eggs (some of which went back to the family my Mom's church was helping).

    There may have been a UDSA store for Food Stamps in some places but that wasn't what happened in rural California - it went directly from the distribution of "commodities" (which were OK for healthy adults but terrible nutrition for a tiny child or elderly person with cancer) to Food Stamps buy what you want.

    Except back then I think I lot of folks reacted like the elderly grandmother in question who wouldn't have dreamed of buying lobster but was crying with joy over being able to choose cheap hamburger or cheap chicken.
    expatriate Californian living in rural Ireland with husband, dogs, horses. garden and many, many cats

  29. #29
    YouTube has countless cooking videos. No .gov money needs to be spent on teaching people how to cook (and, it's not the gov's job). Frequently, the rice or oatmeal package has the directions on how to cook it. How much instruction does a person need to pan fry a slab of meat, anyway?

    Trial and error. People can figure it out.

  30. #30
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    It was in the early 1960’s in the Portland area.

  31. #31
    Quote Originally Posted by Dennis Olson View Post
    It was in the early 1960’s.
    This was about 1967 or so, are you sure it was food stamps and not commodities centers? Although each State may have been different even today the programs are a State and Federal combination of rules, funding etc
    expatriate Californian living in rural Ireland with husband, dogs, horses. garden and many, many cats

  32. #32
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    I was about 4 years old, so I could have misjudged. After all, that was like 400 years ago.

  33. #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by Craftypatches View Post
    It sounds like she has a food addiction which I’m not endorsing but it’s like any other addiction and she needs to get serious help.
    It's more about laziness, ignorance, and no self control. The fact that she weighed around 400 pounds is proof of that.

    You see people buying that kind of crap in massive quantities, and this is exactly what you would expect to see. I hear people talking to others about "thyroid problems," or maybe "metabolism issues," and most of it is pure BS. I see what a lot of them eat, or what they put in their shopping carts.

    Years ago we didn't have high fructose corn syrup in everything. No aspartame, hell we didn't have "diet" drinks. Grocery stores were not so jam-packed with all of this garbage that you see today. Just walking the isles of Walmart makes me ill. Seeing people buying loads of stuff at the bakery, tons of potato chips and other snacks, loads of bottles of coke or other soda, it's sick.

    The die-off is going to be massive.
    -----------------------------------------------------------
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  34. #34
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    I love going to the bakery section for those individual sized little bread loaves. About the size of a kaiser bun. I like to make sandwiches using them rather than flat sliced bread. The taste and texture are far superior. But I do enjoy pastries and get packages of Little Debbie (I don’t do Hostess anymore) Swiss rolls, or donut sticks. I certainly don’t live on them, but I like to have a few in the fridge (yes, I like them cold) if I feel run-down.

  35. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by Faroe View Post
    YouTube has countless cooking videos. No .gov money needs to be spent on teaching people how to cook (and, it's not the gov's job). Frequently, the rice or oatmeal package has the directions on how to cook it. How much instruction does a person need to pan fry a slab of meat, anyway?

    Trial and error. People can figure it out.
    LOL! So there I am in the aisle where the beans are. (I've told this story before). Two fat women were standing there and they had their WIC coupons in hand. That's an added bonus if you had children. WIC (Women, Infants & Children). One says to the other: "Should we buy beans or peanut butter?" The fattest one said "Peanut butter, we don't have to cook peanut butter." My all-time nickname for welfare recipients is "Cocoapuffers." Welfare recipients buy that $hit cereal - it's expensive. They do not care because they aren't paying for it! Welfare and food stamps sticks in my craw.

  36. #36
    Quote Originally Posted by Dennis Olson View Post
    I was about 4 years old, so I could have misjudged. After all, that was like 400 years ago.
    Dennis I was about 11 to 13 and I remember it only because my family was directly involved with a family in this situation.

    This is also why I know what was in the commodities and while the idea of rations isn't totally unacceptable to me (to make sure people get fed rather than starve) I also know they really were not that healthy either.

    Oh, Bardu I was perfectly aware the women would probably have no clue what to do with flour-salt-sugar-etc. but I was supporting the idea of cutting her off from the easy processed garbage at taxpayer expense and forcing her to learn (like I did) if she really wants to eat this stuff.

    My Dad managed to be nearly 500 pounds mostly on peanut butter and another semi-"healthy" things so someone who is real food addicted is going to find something to eat (outside of a famine situation) but I agree that the taxpayer doesn't need to help (or provide "corporate welfare" for Big Food companies).
    expatriate Californian living in rural Ireland with husband, dogs, horses. garden and many, many cats

  37. #37
    Betty, it bothered you?? good, it should. the obese food machine you saw was literally a walking dead person, probably a drain on the medical system and will most certainly be a huge drain soon enough. You and me, and the next generation have, are, and will pay for all the medical treatments until she dies, and it's just a matter of what she does and does not shove into her face. Consider that the govt and medical establishment condone this lifestyle because it's legal. Not only should you be bothered by the human garbage disposal, you should be double bothered that the govt is all for it, doctors know that such eating behavior is slow death so they can make lots of money off it, insurance companies just jack up premiums for you and everyone else to cover it so they don't care, and the processed food industry makes big bucks off what they're pushing!

    Medicare Medicaid is a quarter of the entire budget and growing fast with no solution. Private health insurance is silly expensive and keeps going up. Fat to obese people are and will be SICK people, and they are ultimately that way because of what they shove in their face!

    You should be damn mad and bothered !!!

  38. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by Scotto View Post

    The die-off is going to be massive.
    I predict they will be the last to die - they have a lot to lose before they die. The skinny guy will go first since he doesn't have much fat on him to live on. Your body burns fat when there's no intake of food....muscle loss as well.

  39. #39
    One thing, BettyRose, if you are still following this thread. Life CAN be about abundance. Eat foods you enjoy. If that means serloin, and fois gras...do it. Fatty meat is the staff of life. Add some real butter, if you like. I don't eat any veggies I don't WANT to eat, and I feel much better for it. Find for me the nutritional study that stay people NEED vegetables. Mongolians, the Massi and the Inuit haven't ever bothered. They do fine.

    So, if what is REALLY bugging you, is that you feel you are sacrificing to do everything nutritionally *correct,* on your own money while this slug stuffs her face...just let it go, like Meemur suggested. Her sorry existence doesn't matter; not one bit. Don't waste precious moments giving it any attention. Focus on the beauty of Creation, and all the savory, satisfying foods you love to eat.

  40. #40
    Don’t let it bother you. This goes on everyday by thousands. And I am sure with the millions of illegals it is going to become more common. We the people are powerless to stop this.

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