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OP-ED Get Over Yourselves
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  1. #1
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    3 Get Over Yourselves



    https://townhall.com/columnists/dere...elves-n2549843

    Get Over Yourselves

    Derek Hunter
    Posted: Jul 11, 2019 12:01 AM

    If there’s one thing too many people have too much of, it’s an abundance of self-esteem. The last 20 years has been spent instilling in many children a sense of accomplishment for merely existing. And while existing is fine and a good thing, it’s hardly an achievement, it just is. People are free to live their lives any way they see fit, but this surge in empty self-esteem has created a class of people who do not extend the same “live and let live” philosophy to others, and therein lies the problem.

    The Women’s World Cup just ended and the team from the United States won. I didn’t say they were representing the United States because it doesn’t seem like they wanted to, they were representing themselves.

    Led by narcissist Megan Rapinoe, they beat up on teams with significantly less skill than they had and celebrated goals against them like they just cured cancer. It’s akin to me beating my 2-year-old in a game of Trivial Pursuit and screaming “In your face!” each time I won a piece of pie. When Alex Morgan scored against England in the semi-finals, she mocked her opponents by pretending to sip tea. Why? Arrogance. It was embarrassing and cheapened the victory.

    But she felt entitled. She’d done her job, what she is paid to do (significantly overpaid as a percentage of the money they generate), and treated it like something more than it was.

    It’s not just that team. Every tackle in the NFL is followed by a celebration like they’d just won the Super Bowl. It’s your job to tackle the guy with the ball, doing so 3 minutes into the first quarter is not a heroic act it’s what you’re paid a lot of money to do. Home-runs and slam dunks, which are so common now as to almost be boring, are met the same way.

    It used to be serious accomplishments were the only things treated as such, now existing is.

    This, in my opinion, comes from something I wrote about in my book – the obliterating of the line between “famous” and “infamous.” In the age of social media, people have become obsessed with getting attention. The means of getting that attention are irrelevant, it’s only the attention that counts.

    There was a time when we’d celebrate accomplishment and shun or ignore people who did inappropriate things. We treat them all the same now. Getting followers and clicks on social media is all that matters, how they’re obtained is irrelevant. It’s the ends, not the means.

    Leftists demand we “celebrate diversity,” but why? Who cares that people of different colors and backgrounds merely exist? Skin tone, ethnicity, or who someone sleeps with doesn’t make anyone special. Why celebrate something over which no one has any control and is meaningless? To make people feel special, to boost self-esteem. People who feel they’re special are more likely to feel entitled to special treatment.

    A levelheaded person who knowingly signed a student loan agreement realizes that money has to be paid back. They’re more likely to choose a practical field of study that will enable them to do that, and they’re more likely to choose a school they can afford the debt burden to attend. A person marinated in unjustified self-esteem is more likely to attend a “prestigious” school that costs significantly more and major in something that is unmarketable because that’s what interests them, and they’re special.

    I don’t care if you decide to borrow a quarter of a million dollars to get a degree in gender studies or interpretive dance, but I have no sympathy when you try to nail yourself to a cross over your inability to find gainful employment with a degree that only qualifies you to teach other people dumb enough to make the same mistakes you made. You aren’t the victim, you’re the perp. And you aren’t special, you’re actually the exact opposite – you’re all too common.

    If you want to be celebrated, do something worthy of celebration. Existing is not that.

    The women’s World Cup team won the tournament, that’s worth celebrating. The 13th goal in a blowout against a team with significantly less skill than you is not.

    This isn’t hard. This entitlement mentality leads “teens” to swarm and rob stores because why shouldn’t they? They’re special. It leads newly elected members of Congress to claim victimhood status when they’re vastly outnumbered by their colleagues and lose a vote. And it will rot the country if we, as a society, don’t stop elevating people simply for existing.

    To be treated as special you should have to accomplish something special. Everyone else is nothing but potential, and potential is something with which everyone is born, which makes it decidedly not special. There’s nothing wrong with being normal, which is a lesson people need to learn, but it’s not a cause for celebration. If you want to be cheered, earn it. But exhaling doesn’t qualify.

    People need to get over themselves, and the public needs to help them do that.
    Sapere aude

  2. #2
    Great article! The only bone to pick here is in the second sentence. The self-esteem movement began to take hold in the public schools in the 80's. So I would put it at 30 years instead of 20.

  3. #3
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    Fantastic article and makes many good points about the damage of this self-esteem movement.

    I worked my arse off to write and publish several books and yet that was my job, and I don’t feel extra-special because of it. It was The Thing that I did with my life. We’re supposed to do things with this life.

    And these kids who think they’re special because they can kick/pitch/catch a ball are puzzling to me.

  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by Plain Jane View Post
    Great article! The only bone to pick here is in the second sentence. The self-esteem movement began to take hold in the public schools in the 80's. So I would put it at 30 years instead of 20.
    Good point. Also the public school systems and collages only teach kids to be good employees. Yes men and women. And pushed to government employment.

  5. #5
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    Excellent article. It states what I and others have been saying for a long time but did not have a public forum to state it. The points about football, baseball, soccer and such are spot on. The players are screaming and acting like complete a$$es for what. They are doing the job they are paid to do. Every time I make an accounting entry maybe I should jump up and scream and profess I did it. It is what I am paid to do.
    Visit my Etsy shop at https://www.etsy.com/shop/sawdustandshavings
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  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Plain Jane View Post
    Great article! The only bone to pick here is in the second sentence. The self-esteem movement began to take hold in the public schools in the 80's. So I would put it at 30 years instead of 20.
    Well before then. We were already hearing the self-esteem song when I was in Jr. High which is a long time ago. I graduated high school in '84 so Jr. High was back in the 70's. That makes it 40+ years.
    Find my free fiction stories here.

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  7. #7
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    My friends and I joke about this. We were all raised about the same. Pretty conservative, close knit but above the norm-in-dysfunction(?)-type families. Thinking back to some of the stuff the parents said to us...about "self-worth" shall we say (hahar)...would blister the paint off any less resilient. The simple idea would melt the modern snowflake.

    Being told routinely as kids you are NOT the center of the universe, you can't do anything right, you will never amount to a hill of beans and then getting the detailed laundry list of reasons tossed at you, festered healthy resentment and motivation, along with a bent toward self-examination/humility. Har Har.

  8. #8
    Another thing I noticed over the years.

    I remember as kids we would run into a room full of adults and we waited until they acknowledged us before speaking. We didn't interrupt the adults who were having a conversation. Or if we did we got a stern "don't you see we are talking?"

    Today, kids just interrupt without a second thought and the parents stop all adult conversation, to hear what the kids say no matter how unimportant. No matter what the adults are discussing, the kid comes first, have to hear the kid, as the interrupt, over and over.... I don't even like being around children because any interaction, even if it is 1 child and a dozen adults, well it's always going to be about the child.

  9. #9
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    If AOC doesn't get her way, the "Hard Knocks of life" will still exist. In fact because of the entitlement feeling, they will get worse.

    Extend this thought...

    Look for a society more mean, more spiteful, more self-centered - and more survivors who "get it." Also more victims who don't.

    Genteel will be the loss.

    Dobbin
    I hinnire propter hoc ecce ego

  10. #10
    Being a hero requires sacrifice. she sacrificed nothing.

    Oh a side note, this is why I won't call every one who puts on a uniform a hero. The paper pusher that never sees combat should not have the same title as someone who pulled people to safety despite being wounded.

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by NCGirl View Post
    Another thing I noticed over the years.

    I remember as kids we would run into a room full of adults and we waited until they acknowledged us before speaking. We didn't interrupt the adults who were having a conversation. Or if we did we got a stern "don't you see we are talking?"

    Today, kids just interrupt without a second thought and the parents stop all adult conversation, to hear what the kids say no matter how unimportant. No matter what the adults are discussing, the kid comes first, have to hear the kid, as the interrupt, over and over.... I don't even like being around children because any interaction, even if it is 1 child and a dozen adults, well it's always going to be about the child.

    Yeah. If I had a nickel for every time I heard "Kids should be seen and not heard" and "Little pitchers have big ears".....plus, "GO OUTSIDE!!"

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ta-wo-di View Post
    Excellent article. It states what I and others have been saying for a long time but did not have a public forum to state it. The points about football, baseball, soccer and such are spot on. The players are screaming and acting like complete a$$es for what. They are doing the job they are paid to do. Every time I make an accounting entry maybe I should jump up and scream and profess I did it. It is what I am paid to do.
    You apparently haven't worked with too many of the new generation? LOL

  13. #13
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    So much truth in the OP and all of your comments!
    Is a return to a more measured response to trivial events possible?
    I must be getting really old, but I consider a basketball goal, a soccer goal a trivial event.
    I changes nothing in the world but it generates daylong meaningless talk.
    It is ultimately the cause of incredibly high pay to those who can create emotions.
    And there are more cynical thoughts that I am keeping to myself.

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by NCGirl View Post
    Another thing I noticed over the years.

    I remember as kids we would run into a room full of adults and we waited until they acknowledged us before speaking. We didn't interrupt the adults who were having a conversation. Or if we did we got a stern "don't you see we are talking?"

    Today, kids just interrupt without a second thought and the parents stop all adult conversation, to hear what the kids say no matter how unimportant. No matter what the adults are discussing, the kid comes first, have to hear the kid, as the interrupt, over and over.... I don't even like being around children because any interaction, even if it is 1 child and a dozen adults, well it's always going to be about the child.
    There's a difference between being told you are not the center of the universe and being told you are a total failure as a kid. My kids know they need to have compassion, empathy and courtesy for others (who are also not the center of the universe) and being told you're worthless, etc. God does not make junk, and everyone has the ability to be a human contributing to the world. Many just choose not to. Wasted lives. I'm including all 3 of my brothers as well as my husband and one son.
    Excuses are the tools of the incompetent. ~ Thirsty Rollins

  15. #15
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    "self-esteem movement"
    Even worse to see it in church.

  16. #16
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    The whole country is several decades overdue for a good solid sock in the nose.
    The wonder of our time isn’t how angry we are at politics and politicians; it’s how little we’ve done about it. - Fran Porretto
    -http://bastionofliberty.blogspot.com/2016/10/a-wholly-rational-hatred.html

  17. #17
    Quote Originally Posted by NCGirl View Post
    Another thing I noticed over the years.

    I remember as kids we would run into a room full of adults and we waited until they acknowledged us before speaking. We didn't interrupt the adults who were having a conversation. Or if we did we got a stern "don't you see we are talking?"

    Today, kids just interrupt without a second thought and the parents stop all adult conversation, to hear what the kids say no matter how unimportant. No matter what the adults are discussing, the kid comes first, have to hear the kid, as the interrupt, over and over.... I don't even like being around children because any interaction, even if it is 1 child and a dozen adults, well it's always going to be about the child.
    Remember, the adults have to be smarter than the kids to teach them right from wrong.
    Mike

  18. #18
    "self esteem" is fine, narcissism isn't, and that's what we're getting.

    the article seems to conflate the two very different things

    https://psychcentral.com/news/2016/0...eem/99012.html
    Despite the widely held view that narcissists have extremely high self-esteem, a new study shows that the traits of narcissism and high self-esteem are far more distinct and unrelated than conventional wisdom has led us to believe.

    After reviewing the research literature, investigators from several universities discerned the following differences between narcissists and those with high self-esteem: Narcissists feel superior to others but don’t necessarily like themselves. In fact, narcissists’ feelings about themselves are entirely based on others’ opinions of them. On the contrary, those with high self-esteem don’t think of themselves as superior to others, and in fact, tend to accept themselves regardless of what others think about them.
    I think this article is spot on and said what I was about to say but maybe better, and with more authority on the subject.


    don't conflate self esteem with narcissism.

    I have high self-esteem, but I'm not a narccist because I don't give a shit what you think

  19. #19
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    Leftists demand we “celebrate diversity,” but why? Who cares that people of different colors and backgrounds merely exist? Skin tone, ethnicity, or who someone sleeps with doesn’t make anyone special. Why celebrate something over which no one has any control and is meaningless? To make people feel special, to boost self-esteem. People who feel they’re special are more likely to feel entitled to special treatment.

    Respect of all is granted, until the person shows that respect is not due....

    No one is due special treatment except for the very young, elderly and handicapped.

    I still open doors for females and the elderly and have found that those younger than I am will also hold open doors for me which I thank them for doing.... Having white hair and not so much on top of my head indicates my age, but I am still able to open the doors that I need to go thru....

    The only diversity in America is what is espoused by the left to divide America....

    Texican....

  20. #20
    Quote Originally Posted by NCGirl View Post
    Another thing I noticed over the years.

    I remember as kids we would run into a room full of adults and we waited until they acknowledged us before speaking. We didn't interrupt the adults who were having a conversation. Or if we did we got a stern "don't you see we are talking?"

    Today, kids just interrupt without a second thought and the parents stop all adult conversation, to hear what the kids say no matter how unimportant. No matter what the adults are discussing, the kid comes first, have to hear the kid, as the interrupt, over and over.... I don't even like being around children because any interaction, even if it is 1 child and a dozen adults, well it's always going to be about the child.
    This.

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dozdoats View Post
    The whole country is several decades overdue for a good solid sock in the nose.
    Game, Point!
    Strange times are causing stranger measures...

    1Cor 13:13 And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these [is] charity.
    I Believe in a Just God.

  22. #22
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    OP - the closing sentence:

    People need to get over themselves, and the public needs to help them do that.

    no truer words - the difficulty however is that as soon as "the public" protests the SPECIAL-NESS of any particular victim group or minority they are immediately labeled as bigots, racists, homophobes or misogynists.

    as for this soccer team - if I NEVER have to hear about them or see that twunt Rapino again in my lifetime it will be WAY too soon
    "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9 (NKJV)

    III

    Raging Deplorable - we do NOT forget; we do NOT forgive; we are LEGION

  23. #23
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    A scrumptious delight



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