I was dragged to a relative of the adoptive dad's that I'd never met. She collared all the teens, forced us to babysit the rugrats, and served us only macaroni and cheese at the kids' table. Then she made us wash her dishes. Bleck!
[SIZE="2"][COLOR="DarkOrchid"]I'm not crazy. I've just been in a very bad mood for 40 years.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
[COLOR="Purple"][SIZE="2"][I]You're not famous until someone says they put you on ignore[/I][/SIZE][/COLOR]
[SIZE="2"][COLOR="SeaGreen"]If there's a bright center to the universe, we're on the planet that it's farthest from.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
Howdy, Folks!
I was at the home of my biological parents one Christmas, and was helping to decorate the tree. I was about 6 years old.
Since I was short, my job was to decorate the lower branches. My bio-mom was very particular about how ornaments went - large ones on the bottom, medium ones on the middle, and small ones on the top of the tree - a graduated visual effect.
Anyway, she gave me a box of ornaments to hang. They were big - bigger than my hands, so I needed 2 hands to hold them. I picked up one of them, and it slipped from my hands and hit the floor. It didn't fall very far, but when it hit it vaporized.
Supposedly it was some sort of hand-blown Austrian glass ornament, worth some money. Now, if it were so expensive, I dunno why it would be handed to a 6-year-old who might not have the most delicate coordination to handle such a thing, but there it is.
She went ballistic. I had the living sh!t beaten out of me on the spot, then I was dragged into my room and told to stay in it until I was instructed I could come out.
Several hours later she came in, and quietly asked me if I would like to come out. I may have been 6, but I wasn't stupid - I knew what she had done was dead wrong. I told her no, I'd rather stay in my room.
She never apologized, and ever after wondered why I never wanted to help decorate the tree with them during Christmas.
To this day - I do not put up a tree in my home. I figger it's better to spend the time feeding homeless kids and hanging out with them during the Holiday Season.
No tree for me...
Peace and Love,
Donald Shimoda
________________
Just remember - when you're in pain, when you hurt, when you feel like you cannot take it any more - follow the sage advice of Our Dear Maher: "...there's an Eagles song you should listen to. It's called: 'Get Over It!'"
Somebody ought to apologize to you, so I will.
Yeah, what kind of moron gives fragile stuff to a child??? For safety reasons if not clumsiness??
I was thinking of ick relative stories....yours takes the cake.... I'm sorry
[SIZE="2"][COLOR="DarkOrchid"]I'm not crazy. I've just been in a very bad mood for 40 years.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
[COLOR="Purple"][SIZE="2"][I]You're not famous until someone says they put you on ignore[/I][/SIZE][/COLOR]
[SIZE="2"][COLOR="SeaGreen"]If there's a bright center to the universe, we're on the planet that it's farthest from.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
Don, there's an Eagles song you should listen to. It's called: "Get Over It!"
Yeah, "just get over it" and "move on" are the mantra of fools who never endured abuse....you should be a shrink. All abuse victims will be delighted to learn that listening to Eagles songs will cure their PTSD
[SIZE="2"][COLOR="DarkOrchid"]I'm not crazy. I've just been in a very bad mood for 40 years.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
[COLOR="Purple"][SIZE="2"][I]You're not famous until someone says they put you on ignore[/I][/SIZE][/COLOR]
[SIZE="2"][COLOR="SeaGreen"]If there's a bright center to the universe, we're on the planet that it's farthest from.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
Howdy, Folks!Originally Posted by Maher
Maher,
I learned from a very early age that loving others and spending time with people was a whole lot more important than some pieces of stuff that spend 11 months out of 12 in a box in an attic.
I never forgot, but yes - I did "get over it."
I hope <a href="http://www.timebomb2000.com/vb/showthread.php?t=38642">you did, too</a>.
Peace and Love,
Donald Shimoda
________________
Just remember - when you're in pain, when you hurt, when you feel like you cannot take it any more - follow the sage advice of Our Dear Maher: "...there's an Eagles song you should listen to. It's called: 'Get Over It!'"
Maher, I have found many of your posts to be quite intelligent, so I'm dismayed to find you have no heart. That was a despicable comment to make in response to Donald sharing with us.
Donald, I am sorry as well. And I totally understand how that event would affect how you would think about Christmas trees.
The first Christmas I went home and dad was 4 or 5 months into his slide into Alzheimers.
'nuf said?
c
Hmmm. Well there was one of the last Christmas's that my Dad had, which was in a trailer parked behind a cheap motel. He was descending into the final stages of alcoholism. The trailer rented by the week, and the pipes froze if it went below 25F. My sister and I went up there to visit and stay overnight Christmas Eve with him and his second wife.
We managed to cook a small turkey in the decrepit oven in spite of it all. Add some canned corn, canned gravy, StoveTop stuffing, instant mashed potatoes, canned cranberry sauce. And, of course, lots of booze. It was the winter that I finally accepted the notion that alcoholism had a very dear cost.
But for the grace of God, go I.
So, there I was - at the ice cream store, "pint of Häagen-Dazs in hand" - when I reached into my purse and noticed that my $24,000 bank deposit (which, incidentally, I'd put in my purse because I simply didn't have time to get to the bank before my movie date with my 8 year-old) was MISSING!!!!!
Oh, wait, I think this has already been discussed in an different thread . . .
LOL!!!
"The national budget must be balanced. The public debt must be reduced; the arrogance of the authorities must be moderated and controlled. Payments to foreign governments must be reduced, if the nation doesn't want to go bankrupt. People must again learn to work, instead of living on public assistance."Cicero, 55 BC"The more things change, the more they stay the same." -- popular cliché
Roman author, orator, & politician (106 BC - 43 BC)
This Christmas. The first one in my entire life without my mom. She passed away on February 2, 2006.
Jack
I'm in the same boat with Ironskull. Mom died October 1, 2006. I'm not even going home for Christmas, as there's nobody to go home to. I'm going over to a friends place to build him a new computer instead.
Bah! Humbug!
Worst Christmas......
Back in.....1978 - '79, somewhere in there. My great-uncle, who was
in his 90s and confined to a nursing home....passed away just a day
or two before christmas!
We were the only family he had, so right at the height of the last-
minute holiday rush, we had to deal with funeral arrangements.
So what we had that year was a funeral/christmas.
Definitely put a damper on the holiday!
Edited to add: My heart goes out to all who have suffered pain and
heartbreak at what should have been a joyful time of the year.
Also, I wish to add my disgust at anyone who thinks that physical and/
or emotional abuse can be simply 'brushed off'. I'm another one who's
BTDT. It hurts man....it hurts!
Last edited by Tumbleweed; 12-18-2006 at 05:42 PM.
Four Things You Can't Recover: The stone - after its
thrown, The word - after it's said, The occasion -
after it's missed, and Time - after it's gone.
We're still going to do our normal Christmas Eve at my brother's and Christmas Day dinner here with my brother's family. Only difference is mom won't be here. That has me down but I won't give up Christmas. Mom loved Christmas and so do I and my wife and sons. I will be down for awhile and it will be hard but I will get through it. One of our best friends lost his mom just a few short weeks before I lost my mom and he is in the same boat. He will be with us on Christmas Eve.
Jack
The Computer Chyck
Last Xmas
Spent at my father's deathbed, in a coma from septic shock, last stages of Parkinsons. Madder than h*ck at his doctors for treating him like a specimen and not a patient and remembering asking God to either let him rise and walk or take him home.
He passed on the next day.
To this day I'm angrier than h*ll at his doctors for not explaining to us what was going on with him, the fact what was happening was what happens in the last stages of Parkinsons , and happy that Dad is with our Saviour.
In Memorium: Dad you worked 3 jobs in life to be able to provide for us. Unfortunately when it was your time to enjoy life a bit your health was taken by Parkinsons. I'm sorry that I trusted the bastards with your care as much as I did. They failed you.
Thank you for making me the person I am and there's not a day that passes that I don't think of you once.
All my love..
The Compchyk
PS can't get into the season this year.. They say the 1st year is the worst, and I kinda agree with them.
Sorry to everyone who is having a painful Christmas...
People should not be afraid of their governments. Governments should be afraid of their people. -V
Freedom is such a fragile thing. When you don't have it, and catch a glimpse, it shifts your soul in to another reality. So much so, that to see it end is worse
than living without it and people will gladly die to protect it. -mt4design
The Computer Chyck
Add onto that a couple other Xmas's
Grandfather dying 12/21
Aunt dying 12/17
Grandmother dying 12/7
blech.... I think I'm going to go eat some chocolate....
The Compchyk
I should add that my mother in law died on 12/12/2000
Jack
...hopefully to get a laugh or two.
About 10 years ago we had a power failure about 1/2 hr after the bird went in the oven. Hoping it was going to be a short outage we put the creature on the gas barbeque to at least continue the cooking process. Several hours later, and still without power the turkey was nearing completion.
I lifted the BBQ lid, poked at the buzzard a couple times and then went inside to get a larger fork. I stopped at the fridge to grab (another) beer and chatted with the in-laws who had been patiently waiting for the entire afternoon. Four or 5 minutes later I went outside to re-inspect the bird.
To my horror, my 2 dogs were on the deck finishing a tug-o-war and there were necks and limbs from one end of the backyard to the other. I swallowed hard, took a long guzzle from the beer and then started to laugh. My laughter brought out the guests who ranged from puzzled to horrified and to my wife who was crying and yelling at me.
T'was a vegetarian Christmas.
When I first moved to this area in 1995 I was invited to Christmas dinner at my first cousins by my aunt. The day before Christmas aunties sister died, to no ones surprise as she was in poor health. An hour before the dinner, when I was almost ready to go, my cousin finally remembered I existed and called me to tell me they weren't having dinner. I had only a very small chicken breast and a tablespoon of corn at home. My aunt may not have been at her daughters for dinner but I'm sure everyone else was there - eating hearty. My cousin, for unknown reasons, prefers to pretend my side of the family doesn't exist.
Windy Ridge
Luckily I dont have any horrible Christmas stories....(yet...) I do remember growing up there was 2 Christmas's in a row that tragedy struck the family....First my uncle passed away shortly before christmas...then the following year, my grandma's house burnt to the ground Christmas eve...I remember standing outside looking at the house Christmas morning...I was REALLY young though and really only have nice Holiday memories...
Not that big a deal, but one Christmas Eve the sewer went. Fortunately it was on the county's property and they had to fix it. But, not on Christmas Eve or Christmas day. So, we had it backing up in the bathtub and toilets overflowing. Couldn't flush or run water. Wasn't the most fun. Funny thing about it, same thing happened to my parents when I was growing up, except it was Thanksgiving Day instead of Christmas. Strange coincidence I guess.
Very true.
Long time ago (Nov 11 1988) My mom died.. no real illness.. just went to bed and never woke up. The Doctors said it was a heart attack in her sleep. She was 42 at the time.
That first Christmas was VERY hard.. It felt like it would never be the same.. but in time it got better.
It does get better, you don't forget, you just kind of move on and remember the good times and know that the person you lost, is looking down on you and smiling.
Other then that Christmas, I have to say I have yet to have a really bad one, sure relatives are strange.. lol sometimes family members get on your nerves, but all in all you realize that your family is all you have.. and you just enjoy the time.
Preparedness, when properly pursued, is a way of life, not a sudden, spectacular program.
I spent too much money!
My first Christmas with my girlfriend (now wife) some 25 years ago was at her real dads, with the assorted family members and her dads goofy wife. Everything was OK, until my girlfriend's brother looked at me drinking a beer with horror.
He said, you didn't get that one out of the back right corner of the fridge, did you? I did, as that was the ones my wife's dad said to get. He informed me those were "company beers" only, and they had been in that fridge some 5 stinking years. He saved those for people he really doesn't like.
At the dinner, an awkward affair with a very dry ham, which someone finally complimented, to which the sheep around the table agreed one by one. My FIL said, "it's been in the freezer for 3-4 years, I didn't know if it would be any good. "
Dead silence through the rest of the meal.
Sorry to all those who have lost loved ones and hurt this holiday.
Romans 5:9 Much more then, being now justified by his blood, we shall be saved from wrath through him.
Don,
I too am so sorry for the trauma and the obvious pain that followed, yet I'd like to take you in a totally different direction if I may, personally I believe everything happens for a reason (the only way I've been able to understand some of the hell in my own life) and the pain you felt along with your decision to not spend your time decorating a tree and instead spend your time brightening the lives of those among us who our great society forgot and letting them know they are loved and do matter in the grand scheme is perhaps WHY this happened to you ....you'll never know how many lives you touched and in fact the kids you help might not remember your name yet they will take the spark you ignited within them and turn it into a flame that will change the world. We don't know why bad things happen but when they induce positive actions such as those you do they can't be all bad. Keep up the good work and have a great holiday season. (p.s. just seriously getting into apple systems any tips drop me a pm)
Regards,
Bob
Just noticed this is my 50th post couldn't have been for a better reason..MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!
Last edited by 88Bronco; 12-19-2006 at 01:11 AM. Reason: just say it was my big 50th post !!!!! yea!!!
Membership Revoked
When I saw the comment about the Eagles song "Get Over It", I thought perhaps it just had a provocative title but might have lyrics with a message that was the opposite of the way the title sounds...but I was wrong. I just had to look up the lyrics.
Here they are:
EAGLES LYRICS
"Get Over It"
I turn on the tube and what do I see
A whole lotta people cryin' "Don't blame me"
They point their crooked little fingers ar everybody else
Spend all their time feelin' sorry for themselves
Victim of this, victim of that
Your momma's too thin; your daddy's too fat
Get over it
Get over it
All this whinin' and cryin' and pitchin' a fit
Get over it, get over it
You say you haven't been the same since you had your little crash
But you might feel better if I gave you some cash
The more I think about it, Old Billy was right
Let's kill all the lawyers, kill 'em tonight
You don't want to work, you want to live like a king
But the big, bad world doesn't owe you a thing
Get over it
Get over it
If you don't want to play, then you might as well split
Get over it, Get over it
It's like going to confession every time I hear you speak
You're makin' the most of your losin' streak
Some call it sick, but I call it weak
You drag it around like a ball and chain
You wallow in the guilt; you wallow in the pain
You wave it like a flag, you wear it like a crown
Got your mind in the gutter, bringin' everybody down
Complain about the present and blame it on the past
I'd like to find your inner child and kick its little ass
Get over it
Get over it
All this bitchin' and moanin' and pitchin' a fit
Get over it, get over it
Get over it
Get over it
It's gotta stop sometime, so why don't you quit
Get over it, get over it
[ www.azlyrics.com ]
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
[FONT=Book Antiqua][SIZE=4][COLOR=Red][B]WAY.....TRUTH.....LIFE. [/B][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]
my worst christmas was 1990 my stepdad (but he was my dad you know) passed away on christmas morning after a downhill slide from alzhimers. i'd had been helping take care of him he didn't know my mom but for some reason he knew me.he woke up,got dressed,ate breakfast laid down for a nap and then he passed on. this year i still miss my mother who passed on in winter 05.so no light's no tree bah humbug.
my mom passed in march of this year, but she had been ill and bedridden for the last 10 yrs, so for her it was a blessing to be released. it is still hard that she is gone. DH and i are traveling to memphis saturday to be with my dad, as he is alone. this is the first christmas that i wont be with or see my kids, but i just couldnt let my dad be alone. and they understand. i got everyone to write down their best christmas mempries of mom and dad growing up and ill put them on some nice paper and give it to him.
gonna try again to get him to think about moving out near us.
Merry Christmas Everyone!
jazzy
++++++++++++++++++++
There is Only Jesus--no other worthy of honors or prayers or devotion. Anything or anyone else are end times deceptions distracting us from being fully committed to Christ. There is No Other.
http://jazzyacres.blogspot.com
Has No Life - Lives on TB
Last Christmas, the Christmas that followed Katrina.
One of my sisters and her husband were living in a tent in their backyard. Another had alot of unrepaired damage to her home too, though she could live in it.
We skimped on Christmas, providing Christmas only to our baby, so that we could send what we would normally have spent on Christmas, to family down in New Orleans.
But at least we did not loose any of our family in the mega-storm. 1577 + in Louisiana alone did.
Katrina ruined alot of families Christmases last year.
You are not alone ! My husband still to this day will not put an ornament on the tree becaue of this exact same scenario when he was a little boy.
I told him time and again, hey its just me and you, aiin't nobody here gonna take off no belt to you or make you feel like a piece of crap, but he still to this day cannot enjoy putting ornaments on the tree. (and he is almost 50 years old).
So sad.
For a lot of people including me, Christmas wasn't always a great time because of living with an alcoholic. They can twreck a lot of havic take a Christmas party to a whole new level.
I guess I'm one of the ones that got over it. It motivated me to attempt to make Christmas the way I thought it should be. So far, so good. It helps to only remember the good times. And there were many good times.
Every year I have a simple Christmas wreath placed on my parent's grave. It's a symbol that allows me to include them in the celebration of Christ's birth. I know it doesn't help them but it helps me.
You were given this life because you were strong enough to live it.
I was thinking of mishaps and lowlife relative stories when I started this....but it turned really sad. No idea that so many people had had so many painful holidays. May this one be better.
[SIZE="2"][COLOR="DarkOrchid"]I'm not crazy. I've just been in a very bad mood for 40 years.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
[COLOR="Purple"][SIZE="2"][I]You're not famous until someone says they put you on ignore[/I][/SIZE][/COLOR]
[SIZE="2"][COLOR="SeaGreen"]If there's a bright center to the universe, we're on the planet that it's farthest from.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
Last Christmas, my brother came to Denver. We had a turkey for Christmas day, even though we are normally vegetarians. That night, bro took the carcass and started on turkey soup. So far, so good. Three days later, he was still simmering it.
There are so many posting on this thread about missing folks who have passed.
This morning I started a thread called:
"Missing Passed Loved Ones At Christmas"
http://www.timebomb2000.com/vb/showthread.php?t=222512
Please check it out.
This one.
Beyond my own problems financially, there are the Wu's. They lost their extraordinary daughter Lydia in September: http://www.immanuel.net/sites/masonc...teCalendar.htm . Here are dad Simon's last 2 posts:
Dec 14.
Quite a few friends asked us why don’t we have prayer letter updates in the last several days.
Because I was in the deep pain and sorrow…
It’s “really really really…… bad.” (Lydia used that expression sometimes to describe her headache and suffering.)
The coming Christmas and holiday season is adding a lot more difficulty for us.
We miss Lydia terribly. I feel sad constantly, and had hard time to break it.
Lack of sleep and continuously sorrowful mind upset my stomach and physical strength.
It would be nice that coming holidays can be skipped. But it seemed that God wants us to go through every single day and suffer, although it’s really hard to bear.
I continue praying and reading Scripture diligently to help me go through every day.
Thank you for the cards, greetings, condolence, ornaments, and gifts. We feel your love and care for us, and we thank God for that.
Merry Christmas!
Please appreciate what you have. That is the advice for myself too…
December 17, 2006, Sunday
I called grandma last night intended to chat with her (have not talked to her for weeks). I caught her right before she was going to Sunday worship (they are twelve hours ahead of us.) We did not talk anything at all. Before hung up the phone, she said,
“Make sure everybody is safe and healthy!”
For many years (since we had the first child, and before Lydia got sick), she often said that at the end of our telephone conversion. I would tell her, “I will, don’t worry.” Then, she would be happy.
Of course, she would not say that after Lydia got sick. It was not appropriate.
But she said it again. That touched my deepest wound. (I am a hundred percent sure that she did not mean anything else, she just used to say that at the end of phone conversation. She is indeed a very lovely lady, the comment form many of my friends.)
But I was hurt tremendously right away, a sharp pain in my heart, I told her,
“I am not sure I am capable of that. I failed. Lydia died. All I can say is that everything is in God’s hand, and we need to trust Him...”
“Oh, that is what I mean.” She was aware and corrected herself right away.
After hung up the phone, I was deeply saddened, about Lydia’s death, and about I being a total failure.
“Make sure everybody is safe and healthy…” was the main theme of my nightmare for the entire night.
I had hard time to get up this morning. I had terrible emotion. But, still, needed to wear the mask and went to the church. I greeted everyone at church, making sure no one around me affected by my wounded heart.
In the evening, (this is the warmest December ever), Mom and dad and Priscilla decided to walk to the grocery store to buy something. It was hard at first, (because very quickly we realized that last time we “walked” to the grocery store was with Lydia.)
Mom was crying while we walked, feeling sad, sad, and sad.
However, at the end, we three had good time, we bought some delicious food, may not be too healthy, but we could enjoy.
I thank the Lord that we felt good after the grocery shopping, probably because I had sore arms carrying so much food and walked home.
Life needs to go on. The more fear I have, the harder it would be.
God has mercy and grace, helping us everyday.
</snip>
I know I've gone on about the Wu's, but it just hurts to see this. They're trying hard to walk the walk, but it is clearly very difficult. If you would like to share love and encouragement,
RememberingLydia@zoomtown.com
Somewhere in the clouds, Your peak is shining, Have courage and go
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sc_cqbxF0cg
The year was 1980.
I was at my grandmother's house for a holiday get together. Grandma had a well stocked bar and decided that, at the tender age of 14, it was time to get FUBAR (f****d up beyond all recogonition.) So, right after superior meal made from scratch by Grandma, went down stairs and got FUBAR.
After about an hour of demonstrating that I make a terrible drunk, I went back upstairs, called the local pizza place and ordered 10 large pizzas.
Then I went into the dining room where many of the older guests still were, inlcuding grandma and grandpa and asked mom for her $115 so I could pay for the pizzas. And then the questions started. Mom at one end of the table, me at the other...loud enough for the whole house to hear.
WHY THE HELL DID YOU BUY 10 PIZZAS? Cuz I was still hungry. I hate that cabbage/meatball stuff.
DO YOU KNOW HOW RUDE YOU ARE BEING? WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH YOU? I'm FUBAR Ma.
WHAT DOES FUBAR MEAN? F****ed up beyond all recogonition.
....you could have heard a pin drop on her shag carpeting.
....You have GOT to post what happened next....
[SIZE="2"][COLOR="DarkOrchid"]I'm not crazy. I've just been in a very bad mood for 40 years.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
[COLOR="Purple"][SIZE="2"][I]You're not famous until someone says they put you on ignore[/I][/SIZE][/COLOR]
[SIZE="2"][COLOR="SeaGreen"]If there's a bright center to the universe, we're on the planet that it's farthest from.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
I was hoping to avoid that....You have GOT to post what happened next....
Mom called the pizza place and cancelled the order. I was told to go lay down in my room (I had my own room at my grandparents place). I went in there and started to get the whirlies. Next thing I knew, it was 4:30am and I was in the bathroom for a good hour. Puking, sleeping, moaning with the second worst headache ever...etc.
I went back to bed and got up again around 11. Grandma and Grandpa both informed me I was grounded from TV...which meant no football! Ouch.
Mom was, well, unhappy. She came by to pick me up around 2 that day. It took about 30 minutes to get home. The first 3 minutes were dead silence. She didn't say a word. The other 27 of those minutes I thought the windows were going to break due to the volume at which she expressed her unhappiness. Hangover+rage driven tirade=
It was decided that I would personally apologize to everyone who was there, but beyond that...all three parental units decided that the hangover was punishment enough.
Ahhh..to be young and stupid again.
Last edited by Kickapoo Kicker; 12-19-2006 at 02:51 PM.
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